Sunday, January 3, 2010

Sleep Disorder


I can sleep just about anywhere – while watching TV, in the bathtub, in class, grading papers, talking to friends - but the easiest place for me to fall asleep is while riding in a car. I have been known to start dozing as soon as we turn the corner a block from my house. Then there are the treks returning home from consuming large amounts of food and swallowing large amounts of adult beverages - sleep is a sure thing when the belly is full. Friends and family have even made bets on the time and location my head will start to bob. I have tried to make excuses for my narcolepsy, such as, “I am just resting my eyes.” or “I am concentrating on the lovely scenery.” or “My neck has an uncontrollable tick.” With this problem comes a dilemma – which way will my head actually fall when sleep overcomes me? If it falls forward, it could cause a serious whiplash. Do I nod off to the right? I could risk cracking my skull on the window. Or do I bob to the left? The driver of the vehicle might not care for a hairy head in his lap. Then there is the attractive position of letting my head fall back against the seat. With this action comes the counter-reaction of the mouth popping open, producing strange sounds and possible drool. The only remedy to my uncontrollable sleep problem is to carry my little neck donut. This will not only protect me from injury, but also alert friends and family that I could nod off at a moment’s notice. Excuse me, I think it’s time for a nap.