Monday, October 19, 2009

Mirror, Mirror, on the Wall...

I am at that age when I look in the mirror and wonder, “Who is this person staring back at me, and what did she do with Barbara?” I know reality shows are all the rage now, but I am not ready for the reality of seeing myself age. I still have in my mind’s eye the 20-year old with long brown hair who weighs 120 pounds (Ok… I’ve never weighed 120 pounds, except for one week, and that was because I had been on a starvation diet.). So it’s a little frightening to look in the mirror and see another face in the reflection. I made the mistake of buying one of those lighted make-up mirrors that magnify at 15X. What was I thinking? I thought I had stopped growing hair because I don’t need to shave my legs as often, but now I found it growing on my chin and on my earlobes. I’ve even discovered that I should have been plucking my eyebrows – heaven only knows how long those hairs have been poking out there. It appears that the hair is transferring from the top of my head to the bottom part of my face – damn gravity. And what’s with all those brown spots that are scattered around on my face? They sure aren’t freckles. Even Mary Kay can’t hide those – according to my new mirror.

I guess my best asset has always been my hair – long and straight. I could always seem to tease it with just the right amount of height (I didn’t even need the original “bump” As Seen on TV). I still have fairly long hair (kind of a middle-aged, shoulder-length, stringy do), but I think I’ve stressed it from all the back combing because my mirror is telling me that I am going bald. Horrors!! Bald!! Women who are bald are the ones who play witches at Halloween!! I must find a product that will grow hair back. I thought the little skunk streak of gray sprouting up from my widow’s peak was bad – now I have to contend with bare skin.

The lighted, 15X mirror is going back in the box, and back to the store. I’m exchanging it for Rogaine. God has our eyesight fail for a reason – I’m not arguing with God.

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