The principal doesn’t know your room number…or your phone number.
You haven’t been evaluated for 2 years.
You haven’t gotten a pay increase in 3 years.
They paint your room mustard yellow.
The average classroom temperature is either 84 or 67 degrees.
The air conditioner stops running…in August…in Phoenix.
The students chase the cockroaches around the room…or is it the cockroaches chase the students around the room.
The cockroach takes up permenant residence in the teachers’ bathroom.
They lock the closest bathroom because of the water main leak on the street.
The sidewalk from your building to the cafeteria is gone and you have to walk across a plank.
Your class discussion is interrupted because of the car crashes at the intersection outside your room.
There are more mothers in your classroom than at the maternity ward.
A student’s mom has placed a restraining order on another student, so they can’t be in the classroom at the same time.
At my age, I could be my students’ great-great-grandmother.
Your students have nicer cell phones than you do.
UPS delivers a ticking box to the front office and the entire school is evacuated.
Administration wants all the teachers to park in the same parking lot instead of the lot that is closest to my room. This is a half-mile walk.
The gates are locked during a fire drill.
Our new schedule gives the CTE teachers less time in the classroom and more time to sub in other teachers’ classrooms.
The dean of students is booked for financial exploitation of her elderly neighbor.
An English teacher goes on “administrative leave” for drawing penises on the board.
And the number 1 reason you know it’s time to retire is when…
Your colleagues in your department have had
A neurological disorder
A pacemaker
Breast cancer
Brain surgery
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